So Fast, So Numb
From: New Adventures In Hi-Fi

you're moving through rough waters,
motor boy,
and swimming in your sleep.
how could I be so blind, mis-sighted,
not to see there's something wounded deep.
anyone could scratch your surface now,
it's all amphetamine
you're blasting yourself into the present
to blur some past indignity, say that,

you say that
you hate it.
you want to re-create it

I've been around, I've been your lover.
I let it go, kill devil hills.
you're coming onto something so fast, so numb
that you can't even feel.

you're drinking raw adrenal baby,
and dosey dosey doe.
You're eating cartilage. shark-eyes. shark-heart.
all present tense.
boy, your blood is running cold.
listen. this is now. this is here.
this is me. this is what I wanted
you to see.
that was then. that was that.
that is gone. that is past.
you cast yourself, cast.
passed by, thrown down fast. you say.

you say that
you hate it.
but you want to recreate it.

I've played this round, I've played your lover.
I've played it out and to the hilt.
you're coming onto something so fast, so numb
that you can't even feel.

you love it.
you hate it.
you want to re-create it.
now this is here. this is me.
this is what I wanted
you to see.
that was then. that was that.
that is gone. that is what
I wanted you to feel.

you love it.
you hate it.
I'm spitting out the bitter pill.

I've been around, I've been your lover
I let it go, kill devil hills.
you're coming onto something so fast, so numb
that you can't even feel.

I've played this round, I've played your lover.
I've played it out and to the hilt.
you're coming onto something so fast, so numb
that you can't even feel.

you've played around, you played me lover.
I let it go, kill devil hills.
you're moving so hard, so fast, so numb
that you can't even feel.



(Berry/Buck/Mills/Stipe)

isnt it interesting when you ask people why they are voting for obama they have solid reasons based on policy, but when you ask people why they are voting for mccain they always start the sentence with "well, obama..."

in other news... neither the sticker or the button that i ordered almost a month ago ever showed up. i am wondering if someone is stealing my mail. my very italian landlords don't seem like the type, but they could be very republican. i can't tell. they might not have even known what the package was though, so they probably would have ignored it.

so, i took action and spent my last 12 dollars at barackobama.com and ordered a couple of buttons and a car magnet. lets hope those actually come in the mail.

last night i watched the debate alone b/c b was too tired to come over, but i felt a little crazier yelling at the tv with no one around, so i had to distract myself. i talked to him online and told him i was yelling at the tv, he thinks its funny.

i nearly missed the shuttle this morning, it was a bit late, but it showed up JUST as i got over the huge hill that i have to trek up every day. thank goodness there were people already waiting at the stop or he may have blown us by.

i got my obama tshirt in the mail. i shall represent.

this whole bailout thing was handled so poorly. why didn't anyone stand up and explain it to the public? its an extreme failure of management. with all the corporations also failing, i'm a little worried about the management of everything in this country.

i cannot wait until the VP debates. i really hope palin is decimated, in the nicest way possible.

i've posted something over at blogspot if you'd like to read it. i'm too lazy to double post.

it sucks so much to not know where you stand at any given time.  i mean, it really really sucks.  whether its a job, or a friend, or a lover, or a spouse, unless you just absolutely do not care, it really sucks.  know what i mean? 

is it possible to die from a broken heart? 

the braves game was rained out. booooo.

i have been feeling really off lately. i thought it was the new job new routine thing, but i don't know if it is now. i think its something else. i can't really pinpoint it, there are a lot of things going on right now that are causing stress. i love my job though, thank god for that. i don't know if i could handle it all while working at my last job.

i am getting my hair cut tonight! i want short wispy bangs and a sort of angled choppy bob thats short and spikey in the back. i am just trying to keep cutting my hair until all the damaged stuff from the platinum blonde days is gone.

i am so tired today. i have had plenty of sleep and i've had a large coffee and 2 shots of espresso. what is up with me today?

on another note, brian and i are going to a baseball game tonight! it might rain so i've sent him out for ponchos. i can't wait. we live so close to the stadium and we always have so much fun when we go. i hope the fireworks don't get rained out. even if its crappy out we should have a fun time. maybe they'll give us free tickets to another game if it gets rained out?

daisy is pregnant, too. dexter's sister. i emailed our neighbor and said i would take the puppies. i want them to have good homes. i wish they'd get those pets fixed, there are so many cats over there, and 3 dogs, and nobody is fixed. if i didnt think she was really against fixing them, i'd offer to take them to get fixed. i think i'd offend her if i did, and i highly doubt she'd let me take them anyway.

i doubt i'll hear anything from her, but i may end up with several puppies at my house in a few months if she lets me take them, so if anyone wants a puppy, tell me now!

i am alive, i swear. i'm just busy and i've completely stopped looking at livejournal. i'm sorry. i'll join in again, i swear.

well this has been an eventful month.

i had been applying casually to Turner and Emory, not really thinking that i would ever get hired, or even an interview really.

about a month ago, i got a call from someone at emory, asking if i would like to interview for a position there.

i mostly thought 'okay, they just want to get a comparison' and the interview would lead to nothing.

well, i got a call 2 days later to come back for a second interview. during the second interview, jeri, the hiring manager made a little slip when she said 'i hope we'll see you next week'. i wasnt sure how to take that, was she just making conversation? was she letting out a hint that they really like me and i might get hired? it was driving me crazy.

well, about a week later, i got another call. it was jeri telling me that they were planning to give me an offer for the position!

its kind of crazy, i had mixed feelings. i would definately miss the people i work with now, but i didnt really think i'd miss the job at all. it was high stress and too much work for one person to do, etc....

i will definately miss my coworkers though.

yesterday was my last day of work at my former job. i will be in and out of there, probably doing a little work for them here and there, but nothing like before.

on wednesday, i start at emory. i am really excited and nervous and anything else you can imagine.

the benefits there are amazing, which is why i chose to casually apply there in the first place, with no real hope of actually getting a job.

it will definately be a whole new world for me this year.